Fuck you, fear

Oh boy.

I sometimes wonder how people without anxiety disorders deal with stress and deadlines, people on our course for example. When it's deadline time, Max and Lizzie get so stressed, they disapear in their rooms for days on end, or they get really mad at a drop of a hat, and upset. But do they get anxious, like me? I don't know, I guess. Maybe that's why I'm so laid back, or atleast, why I appear so laid back, because when it comes down to it I'm too anxious to get as stressed as they do. But I am still stressed (the white hair is a testament to that).

I'm really worried about getting my projects finished on time, I still have one more comic cover to do, I need to finish my dissertation during Easter, and once those are done I need to ink this 12 page comic before our deadline. I think it's the 12 page comic that's freaking me out so much, but now it's the dissertation too. I was doing fine- was on a roll in-fact, till Catrin asked me to write about feminist history. Now I'm all discombobulated.

But I'm not going to start feeling better till I DO something about it.

One thing I learned during that panic attack a few years ago is that fear can paralyze you. I'd never known how powerful it could be till that moment.

Well, time to overcome fear, then.

I'm going to add up all that I've written so far, see how much I have left to write, finish up the bits I already have, write my conclusion, and then anything left can go on feminist history. Thinking that, makes me feel so much better and less afraid.

So let's get to it!

UPDATE: Well fuck me, I've already got 9121 words. I guess I'll just write my conclusion then, tidy up what I have, and then write some stuff about feminists... Huhn. Wow.